


Passenger

by thegreatandpowerfultoaster



Series: Passenger 'Verse [1]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: (partly), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Animal Death, Body Horror, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Worms, Canonical Character Death, Corruption!Martin, Emetophobia, Epistolary, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Angst, Found Footage, Hive!Martin, Horror, Implied/Referenced Sex, Multi, Phone Calls & Telephones, Poetry, Polyamory, Slow Burn, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Sort Of, Statement Fic, Texting, These are just to be safe, Trypophobia, Worms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:27:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 67
Words: 10,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21529810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatandpowerfultoaster/pseuds/thegreatandpowerfultoaster
Summary: Martin:Honestly?I'm falling apart.Like, literally.
Relationships: Jonathan Sims/Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims/Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood/Tim Stoker, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added
Series: Passenger 'Verse [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1567009
Comments: 130
Kudos: 221





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit of an experimental fic for me, so tell me what you think!


	2. Chapter 2




	3. Chapter 3




	4. Chapter 4




	5. Chapter 5

* * *

_*the sound of a tape recorder clicking on*_

**Jon:**

Statement of Martin Blackwood, regarding -

**Tim:**

Is now really the time for this? He's at accident and emergency, for God's sake.

**Jon:**

If we don't get it own now, we might not ever get it down, and that isn't a risk I'm willing to take.

**Tim:**

Really? That's what you're worried about? Not like he's a person, just another subject for you to take a statement about?!

**Jon:**

I don't think -

**Martin:**

I'll do it! I'll do it, just please stop arguing, I can't even think because you two are being so....Just until the doctor gets back.

**Jon:**

Of course. Statement of Martin Blackwood regarding...?

**Martin:**

The follow-up on the Carlos Vittery case.

**Jon:**

Statement given March...

**Tim:**

Twelfth.

**Jon:**

Statement given March twelfth, twenty-sixteen, taken direct from subject. Start at the beginning, please.

**Martin:**

So...I went to check out Carlos Vittery's apartment in follow-up to a statement. He was the one who had the...uh, spider problem. Although I guess he got the lucky end of that deal, since I think I wouldn't have minded spiders at much as I mind this.

I went through that whole building and don't have any piece of evidence or new information to show you. I'm...sorry.

**Jon:**

It's quite all right. I didn't expect there to be much more information anywas, his whole story didn't fit together quite right. Just another fake.

**Martin:**

Fake? You think everything we're doing is fake! Should I show you? Should I show you what they did to me? Or will that not be enough evidence for you? Look, Jon. Look at what she did to me and-and tell me it isn't real.

**Jon:**

Oh my -

**Doctor:**

Mister Blackwood? We'll see you -

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	6. Chapter 6




	7. Chapter 7




	8. Chapter 8

_*the sound of a tape recorder clicking on*_

**Jon:**

Are you ready?

**Tim:**

Yeah, sure. Ready as I'll ever be.

**Jon:**

Statement of Timothy Stoker, regarding the state of his coworker. Statement taken direct from subject on March fourteenth, twenty-sixteen. Recording by Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute.

**Tim:**

Right, so you already know the bits about how Martin found Jane Prentiss and was trapped in his house for like, two weeks, and then some of the worms got in, and he didn't notice them until it was a little too late?

**Jon:**

I have taken Martin's account, yes. 

**Tim:**

Right. So while you and Elias and Sasha have been combing through the archives looking for her statement or anything else that might help, I've been staying with Martin. And he's...not right.

**Jon:**

Not right? What do you mean? Is he dangerous?

_*tim laughs*_

**Tim:**

No. No, not any more than Martin's usually dangerous. He's still clumsy, but that's about it. He's just...he's always humming to himself, you know? And Martin...well, he doesn't hum, so I guess it struck me as weird at first, so I asked him what he was humming, and he said he wasn't sure.

And he's just...not right. It's the little things, you know? And he hasn't been scratching at those things on his side's at all. I would be. I dunno how he isn't.

**Jon:**

I...Perhaps he just doesn't want to irritate them further?

**Tim:**

I dunno. If it was just that I could get past it. But...all of that, and the way he just holds himself...I don't know how to explain it without sounding just as weird.

**Jon:**

Can you try? I suspect it could be useful as soon as we can corroborate it with Ms. Prentiss's statement.

**Tim:**

It's...like...I dunno, when you hold a cat, or a baby, or something. You sort of sit up straighter, and wrap your arms around yourself, yeah? He keeps doing that, but there's nothing there.

And he gets up in the middle of the night and wanders to the window, and just sits there, half-asleep. I thought maybe he just needed someone to help him with nightmares, so yesterday I...well, I know what you think of me, Jon but I wouldn't take advantage of Martin like that. But I said I'd like to move from the couch to his bed, but it didn't stop him.

It's like he didn't realize he was doing it.

**Jon:**

And that's when the incident happened? Last night?

**Tim:**

Yeah, right. I got him back to bed, and we were just laying there, and he said, "Tim, I can feel something, moving around in me." And I obviously had a full on freak out, because he sounded so calm about it. And after a minute, when I finally managed to calm down myself I asked him if I needed to call anyone of drive him back to A and E. 

And he told me no. He said something like, "No, I can't feel it anymore. It can't have really been there." 

and so...I didn't do anything. Just wrote it off and went back to sleep. I didn't feel anything, obviously I thought you should know.

**Jon:**

I...Thank you, Tim. That's all I needed.

_*the tape recorder clicks off*_


	9. Chapter 9




	10. Chapter 10

**Jon:**

Hello?

**Tim:**

We really, really need to talk and I've only got as long as it reasonably takes to buy ice cream and rent a movie.

**Jon:**

I'm not sure there's all that much to talk about, there isn't anything helpful in Prentiss's statement. Or Harriet Lee's, or Timothy Hodge's. Things are not looking especially promising. I'd like to have him stay in the archives until further notice.

**Tim:**

And you're telling me about this, and not him, why?

**Jon:**

He'll listen to you! You're his friend. And...I can't say that I have a great deal of confidence that he's not going to become a liability.

**Tim:**

So you don't want that on your shoulders. Listen, man. I know you don't want to, but you've gotta be the one to talk to him about this. Sit him down in your office, tell him about the Prentiss statement. And give him a good idea of his odds. You owe him that, in case you haven't noticed, he's head over heels for you.

**Jon:**

You have yourself and I mixed up. 

**Tim:**

Yeah, no. Look, I've got to go, but just call him or something, okay? Bye.


	11. Chapter 11




	12. Chapter 12




	13. Chapter 13




	14. Chapter 14

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Jon:**

Martin! Martin, are you-Oh. Dear Lord, Martin!

**Martin:**

I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry but I don't think I can stop it.

**Jon:**

No, no, don't apologize I...Let me hold your hair back, at least.

Are you...do you think that's all?

**Martin:**

I don't know. I don't know anymore. I'm going to die, aren't I?

**Jon:**

I -

**Martin:**

Please don't lie to me to make me feel better.

**Jon:**

I don't know. It doesn't look promising, but we're trying. Why don't you sit down, I'll get you a glass of water. 

Here you go.

**Martin:**

Thanks. 

If I were to do something rash, would you get mad at me? I mean, I'm going either way, right? I just want to try something.

**Jon:**

That's vague. Define rash, and I'll decide how angry to get.

**Martin:**

Will you just trust me? Just this once?

**Jon:**

I...Okay.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	15. Chapter 15




	16. Chapter 16




	17. Chapter 17




	18. Chapter 18

**Tim:**

Hey.

**Martin:**

H-Hi. Sorry I snapped at you earlier. Even if it was just over text, I feel awful.

**Tim:**

Whatever. I can't blame you really. Are you hurting?

**Martin:**

Not right now. It's sort of off an on, and worse if I itch. I think I'm going to have to start wearing turtlenecks everywhere.

**Tim:**

Hmm. Or scarves. I've got plenty I can loan you, when you come back to work

**Martin:**

Alright, I wouldn't mind that. I...I hope it won't be so bad that I can't be back by tomorrow. 

**Tim:**

Don't push yourself. If anyone has a problem about it I'll fight them for you.

**Martin:**

...I hate how dedicated to that you sound.

**Tim:**

What can I say, really, it's been one of those weeks.

_*martin laughs*_

**Martin:**

Yeah. Yeah, it sure has.

I...Thanks, Tim. For answering. Even after I was a jerk.

**Tim:**

Any time.

**Martin:**

Anyway, I think I'm going to try to get some rest. See you in the morning?

**Tim:**

Yep. G'night.

**Martin:**

Goodnight.

_*dial tone*_

**Tim:**

Don't let the bedbugs bite.


	19. Chapter 19




	20. Chapter 20




	21. Chapter 21

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Jon:**

Statement of Martin Blackwood and Timothy Stoker regarding the attack on the Institute by the entity formally known as Jane Prentiss. Go.

_*crosstalk*_

**Tim:**

Whatever the hell -

**Martin:**

I didn't mean to -

Sorry. You go ahead.

**Tim:**

Yeah, okay. I dunno, you got most of it on tape, even after what happened to Sasha. So...So I'll just start from when Martin got lost. I thought he was following us, you know.

**Martin:**

And I thought you were following me.

**Tim:**

So we got seperated, and then we ran into Prentiss, coming up from the tunnels. And...and those worms started crawling up my legs, and as much as I kicked and tried to hurt them, there was always more. And Prentiss had you, I think. Honestly couldn't see a whole lot. And then Elias pulled the fire alarm, right? And that scream happened, and she just...died, I guess.

And...most of the worms in me stopped moving. Maybe it was all of them. I blacked out. 

**Martin:**

And that's when it hurt. Not...Not physically. I mean, sort of. I don't know if I can explain.

**Jon:**

Just do your best.

**Martin:**

They're...they're part of me. Jane described it like being a home, but that's not quite right. They aren't me, but I am them? I could feel them hurting, but it was like hearing an echo. I was down in the tunnels still, I couldn't have gotten any of the Co2 on me. And the ones she put there died. Not any of mine, though.

**Jon:**

_Yours?_ Fascinating - I...I mean, I'm sorry, Martin. Is that when you found her?

**Martin:**

No, that was a little bit after. I knew Jane was gone, so I was trying to find my way out, and that's when I stumbled into the room where she was. I don't know if I ought to be talking about it much. The police already didn't seem like they liked me much when they saw me refuse the EMT's help.

**Tim:**

Is that all? I'd really like to go home.

**Jon:**

I...Yes, that should be all. Thank you both for your time. Statement ends.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	22. Chapter 22

**Jon:**

\- Nothing else, we have a name for our mystery burn victim from case zero-one-two-one -

_*door creaks open*_

**Martin:**

Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't know you were recording! I'll just -

**Jon:**

No, no. Come in. Can I help you with something?

**Martin:**

It's just...I was wondering if you wanted me to bring you anything for lunch? Tim still isn't here, and Sasha already left, so I though -

**Jon:**

No! That's quite alright, I mean. I'll eat later. Is that all?

**Martin:**

I...Guess so? Sorry for interrupting.

**Jon:**

It's no trouble.

Actually. Martin, I do have one question. You've moved out of the Archives, correct?

**Martin:**

Yeah, I'm back in my flat now. I don't want to get, well, me everywhere on the papers, y'know?

**Jon:**

Those worms aren't you, Martin.

**Martin:**

Okay, Jon. Sure you don't want anything?

**Jon:**

That's really alright.

_*door closes*_


	23. Chapter 23




	24. Chapter 24

_I don't know_

_what to tell you_

_Would you feel better_

_if we pretended_

_I wouldn't Squirm or Writhe under your touch?_

_It's been_

_A week_

_To the day._

_when I chose this over Death_

_I didn't know I'd lose you_

_both of you_

_But I'm a home_

_for a thousand things_

_both literally,_

_and for the thousand feelings_

_writhing_

_like the Silver worms_

_that coat my insides now_

_I wish you'd even look at me_

_both of you_

_but I'm not stupid_

_(but I'm naive)_

_and I hurt you_

_or She hurt you_

_And that's good enough for you_

_I can push away the feelings, though_

_so I can focus on the things you need me to_

_and I can Pretend_

_everything is fine_

_while what's really going on is hidden inside me_

_(mostly)_

> **~Martin K. Blackwood, 'Pretend'**


	25. Chapter 25

**Martin:**

Oh, you picked up! Good! This is important, I know you went home, but -

**Tim:**

Martin, I'm really busy. Can we speed this up past the floundering portion of this conversation?

**Martin:**

...I don't have to tell you shit, I just thought you might want to know that I saw a picture of your house on Jon's desk, and a folder with...what looked like a lot of personal information.

**Tim:**

Oh, so _now_ we're gonna be - Wait, what? Why?!

**Martin:**

I dunno, might have something to do with the bout of paranoia he's been suffering about Gertrude's death. I guess I can't blame him, what other reaction is he supposed to have?

**Tim:**

A Goddamned reasonable one! I'm talking to Elias, and then the whole Gertrude thing with be off his mind because he'll be out! I should...I should kick his ass, that absolute -

**Martin:**

Tim! 

**Tim:**

No! No, 'Tim'. I've put up with this for long enough. And I thought we'd been getting along before....I know you're in love with him or whatever, but I swear -

**Martin:**

About that -

**Tim:**

The absolute nerve, thinking I'm a _murderer_ , of all things! I'll show him a murderer, watch out, Jonathan Sims.

_*dial tone*_

**Martin:**

Okay. Love you too, you're welcome, goodbye, Tim.


	26. Chapter 26

**Tim:**

AAAaaah!

**Sasha:**

What are you screaming about?

**Tim:**

There! It's one of those-those worms!

**Martin:**

Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry, Tim. I didn't notice he'd gotten away, I know how you feel about them, I'm so sorry.

**Tim:**

Him?!

**Martin:**

Uhm, yes?

**Tim:**

Do they all have names, too?

**Martin:**

There are too many to name.

**Tim:**

Oh, because that makes me feel so much better. Just...just get it out of here.

_*muffled slightly*_

This job is a nightmare. 

_*no longer muffled*_

What? What are you staring at?

**Sasha:**

Nothing. I just thought that you and Martin were friends...Aren't you?

**Tim:**

Yeah, we were-no, no we _are_ , but it's like you guys don't get it. I got half-eaten by worms, and now my boss and former friend is apparently stalking me because he thinks I murdered his predecessor, and Martin is apparently full of worms now, but aside from the high collared jumpers and jackets you wouldn't know anything was wrong.

I'm done. I'm really, really done. I'm fact, I'm gonna go talk to Jon about it right now.


	27. Chapter 27

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Martin:**

Okay, we're going to make a recording now, please stay where you're supposed to.

...Or not, that's alright too.

_*shuffling sounds, a sigh*_

**Martin:**

This list is of how things changed since I let the...Well, I guess we're just going to call it the Hive. Since I became part of the Hive. And I guess this recording is for posterity, or the Archives, or-No.

No, this recording is mostly for me. Maybe if I talk about it, it won't feel so weird. 

I guess the biggest change is probably the holes. They're...all over me, sort of but the biggest patches are on my chest, and stomach. They're pretty deep, I think. I haven't exactly stuck my hand in there or anything, but when the worms go in there they feel deep.

They're sort of black-ish on the outside, like a bruise, but they don't hurt anymore.

I'm getting more holes, too and I figure eventually I'll end up looking like Prentiss, but I don't know if that scares me as much as it used to.

The ones on my neck always itch, but I don't know if that's because they're getting bigger or because they like to sort of congregate up there. Maybe they like to see, and be up high. 

Oh, I guess that brings me to the worms themselves. Well, they look like Prentiss's, silver and wriggly. 

_*shuffling sounds*_

**Martin:**

Oh yeah, and they keep wandering off, which just makes everyone give me more weird looks. I haven't got any in my tea yet, so I think I deserve a little more credit. 

I can differentiate between them now. Not that any of them look different, but they're part of me, and I just know. They're actually pretty smart, and they seem to settle down for the evening about the same time I do. 

I feel pretty good, for being as hollowed out as I am. Jon said something the other day in a recording I head about a possible connection between the plague and the bug stuff, but I don't feel sick or anything. Physically I feel better than I have in a while, though I think I've gotten paler, so people keep asking me if I'm going to pass out.

When they aren't avoiding me, that is. 

I've taken to wearing thicker jumpers around, and I bought myself a few scarves, and it's not always the perfect system to keep them where they're supposed to be, but its mostly okay. I usually keep the spitting out worms mid-conversation to a minimum, that is.

I think that's all though. I can make an update later if anything changes, right? This isn't all bad, even if I sound ridiculous for saying it, I just wish everyone else could work out whatever their problems were between themselves so I could show them thing really aren't so bad. 

Not that I think they're silly, but just because things aren't ideal doesn't mean there has to be infighting, you know? You don't know, you're a tape recorder.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the one after it take place directly after Jon & Tim's conversation at the end of ep 65: Binary.


	29. Chapter 29

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Martin:**

Hey! Hey, you okay?

**Tim:**

I...I don't know. You're holding my hand.

No, no you didn't have to stop, it's just...There aren't any...Y'know.

**Martin:**

...Worms?

**Tim:**

Yeah. 

**Martin:**

Did you think there would be?

**Tim:**

I dunno. Maybe. The way Prentiss looked, they were everywhere. 

**Martin:**

Yeah well, mine are mostly under my clothes. 

Are you okay? 

**Tim:**

Sure.

**Martin:**

So no, but you don't want to talk about it, either.

**Tim:**

Are you happy here, Martin?

**Martin:**

That's kind of a loaded question.

**Tim:**

Don't care, I wanna hear it.

**Martin:**

Okay, well...I guess I shouldn't be. If I hadn't been working here I wouldn't have been in Vittery's apartment building. The supernatural isn't even something I'm passionate about, I just started here because I wanted to do well financially.

But yeah. I _am_ happy here, because you and Jon and Sasha are like family to me. I think you're the best friends I've ever had, even. So, it's silly, but yes.

What about you, Tim? Are you happy here?

**Tim:**

I don't know. I wish I could leave, but...I can't. I can't leave, Martin.

**Martin:**

It's selfish, but I wouldn't want you to. I've missed your company. I wouldn't hurt you. I couldn't!

**Tim:**

You don't get it!

I know you wouldn't, but every time I look at you I see _her_ , and you just act like nothing's different. I can't do that, Martin I can't pretend everything in this hellhole is normal or okay.

**Martin:**

What else should I be doing? I can't be having an existential crisis every time I feel one of them crawling. And I...I don't know how to stop you from seeing her. What do I do to make you just see me? It doesn't have to be different. I don't _want_ it to be any different!

**Tim:**

It has to be! It has to be different somehow.

**Martin:**

Then how?

**Tim:**

I don't know, okay? Why does everyone expect me to know. 

I...I'm going home, Martin. See you tomorrow, I guess and the day after that, and the day after that, because I can't leave, no one can leave!

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	30. Chapter 30

_Today we talked for the first time_

_since things started being serious._

_Well I always knew_

_they were serious,_

_but you'd flirted your way to official explanations_

_and decided that was enough for you,_

_the way it will never be for me_

_you said you saw her_

_when you looked at me, and I told you_

_that I didn't know how to fix it_

_You're broken in a way I can't comprehend_

_no matter how hard I try_

_someone else would understand_

_but I hear the yelling matches you have with that someone_

_and am tempted to stop you somehow_

_But I can't_

_Because I promised myself I wouldn't hurt you_

_even for your own good_

_I could call you but you wouldn't answer_

_offer you the same comforts you've given me_

_but you wouldn't accept_

_because when you see me you see a monster_

_that I am suddenly_

_trying_

_not to be_

_I could give you a family like mine_

_but it'd hurt more than heal, I think_

> **~Martin K. Blackwood, 'On Our Working Relationship'**


	31. Chapter 31




	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long story short, snow happened, internet line snapped, I'm back now!

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Martin:**

Update on my last recording, I guess.

I am...Very, very hungry. And it's not normal, like...food hunger. But it's not that I suddenly want to eat people or anything! Actually, I don't know what I want, but I'm hungry all the time and it's a deep, deep hunger that I don't know how to fix. 

I think I want to turn someone else. Give them a hive like mine. That sounds awful, and I wouldn't, I _won't_ \- it's just another change and I needed to get it down.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	33. Chapter 33

_*the recording becomes more warped and full of static as it progresses*_

**Michael:**

Hmmmm. Will I let the Filth into myself? I will not like the way the worms crawl, but you are human enough to make it fun, I think. You will still be lost and your Archivist still unaided.

**Tim:**

Hey, don't call my-Don't call Martin that. 

_*a clear, ringing but Distorted laugh*_

**Michael:**

But he is, assistant. He is like them, like your Archivist is to the Eye. Oh, I will enjoy watching what the Eye will do to him.

**Tim:**

Just...If you're not going to help us, shut up!

**Martin:**

Tim, I don't think telling the man with the sharp hands to shut up is the greatest plan- 

_*recording fizzles for a moment before fading back in*_

**Tim:**

We can take a break if you need to, I-

**Martin:**

No, no we can't! I'm fine, It'll take more than a little vertigo to stop me, we can't stop now.

**Tim:**

We've been wandering for God knows how long, and _I_ need a sit-down, so...

**Martin:**

That's my trick. Fine. Fine but just for a minute, okay? We still don't know what happened to whatever that thing in the hall was, or where Jon is.

**Tim:**

D'you think it got Sasha?

**Martin:**

What?

**Tim:**

The thing in the hall. It looked like her, sort of. It could be like a shapeshifter or something. 

**Martin:**

I...I don't know. Anything is possible, obviously but I'm kind of trying not to think about this whole thing very hard. I'm sorry, Tim.

**Tim:**

You're sorry? Dear Lord, Martin you don't have to apologize for everything you know.

**Martin:**

I know, I just don't really know what else to do right now.

**Tim:**

Well, I wouldn't really mind if you held my hand again.

**Martin:**

Really? I thought that-

**Tim** : 

I miss you, Martin. It doesn't change the fact that sometimes I have nightmares about what you are now, or how much worse it's going to get, but I'm starting to get tired of being angry and alone. So...This is an olive branch, or whatever.

And if Jon hasn't gone and done something stupid, he gets the olive branch, too. 

**Martin:**

I miss you too. Both of you. I mean, you started arguing with each other and I-I dunno. It just makes me feel awful. I miss you, and I miss Sasha, and Jon, too even if he's been a jerk.

I did what I had to if I wanted to stay alive, Tim.

**Tim:**

I know. I know you did, and I guess I'm glad. It's hard to be glad about it, though.

**Martin:**

I get it. At least, I think I do. It's...I wish I could explain what it's been like for me. Uncomfortable, but not bad. I chose it, though, and you didn't, and I respect that.

We should...We should go.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	34. Chapter 34




	35. Chapter 35




	36. Chapter 36




	37. Chapter 37

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Melanie:**

So...You and Tim, right?

**Martin:**

What about us?

**Melanie:**

You're together, right? I mean, the way you're always walking around the office holding hands and bickering like an old married pair -

_*crosstalk*_

**Martin:**

No we're not - Are we? I mean, we take lunch together every day and we _are_ always holding hands...am I that oblivious? What is he getting out of - 

**Melanie:**

I mean I could be wrong, and he strikes me as non-monogamous or whatever but I -

You don't know if you're dating him.

**Martin:**

Well I was pretty sure I wasn't until you brought it up.

**Melanie:**

So this is just holding hands because you don't like him.

**Martin:**

I like him, I just don't know if the feeling's returned enough to get him past the stuff he's gone through.

**Melanie:**

Oh, is that his excuse for being a prick?

**Martin:**

He's doing better than he was a few weeks ago, to be fair. 

**Melanie:**

Glad I wasn't around, then. Somebody said you liked Jon, too. 

**Martin:**

I do! He didn't kill anyone. I don't care what it looks like, someone else did. Jon wouldn't kill anyone, that's just ridiculous!

**Melanie:**

Geez, slow down. For the record, I don't think so, either but it's not like I knew him super well. You don't have to defend your choices in men to me, you know.

**Martin:**

Right, right. Sorry. I just get so mad, thinking about it. 

I'm going to talk to him. Uhh, Tim, that is. 

**Melanie:**

To determine wether or not you're dating?

_Martin:_

...Yes.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	38. Chapter 38




	39. Chapter 39

**Tim:**

Timothy Stoker speaking!

**Martin:**

Where are you? Do you know how many times I've called?! I thought we were going to ride together to work this morning?

**Tim:**

Oh, we're we? I'm sorry, I totally forgot. Actually, I'm in Malaysia. Hopped on a flight. Sorry, it was kind of unplanned or I would've asked if you'd like to come. Just got off the plane, actually.

**Martin:**

Sorry, back up. You're in Malaysia?

**Tim:**

Yeah, don't tell Elias, he'll be pissed.

**Martin:**

Why would I? He's already in an awful mood, I wouldn't tell him - Why are you in Malaysia?

**Tim:**

Call it a vacation. What's he going to do, right? Fire me?

**Martin:**

No, I suppose not. You could've told me I was going to have to fill in, at least.

**Tim:**

Sorry, I literally booked seats on the flight last night after you said you'd gone to bed. It's just a couple statements left in that box, and besides, I'll be back by next week.

**Martin:**

Next...Next week?

I hope this trip does wonders for your health, or something.

**Tim:**

It will. Distance will do wonders, not to mention all the hiking and swimming and -

**Martin:**

Alright, I get it you're going to have a great time.

**Tim:**

We'll plan in advance next time, and not use up vacation days. Where do you want to go?

**Martin:**

Why are we planning this now? I don't know. I don't really have anywhere -

**Tim:**

C'mon, there must be somewhere.

**Martin:**

I - No, not really. I wouldn't mind just going on a picnic or something sort of our of the ordinary for us. It doesn't have to be big. Just, an afternoon off is all I need. 

**Tim:**

Good. Good, we'll do that, then. I'll call later, okay? It might be at a weird time, but I'll try not to.

**Martin:**

Yeah, okay.

Have fun.

**Tim:**

I will, bye Martin.

**Martin:**

Goodbye.


	40. Chapter 40

**Melanie:**

Uhh, hello?

**Martin:**

Hi, this is um...This is Martin. From work.

**Melanie:**

Oh, hey. 

**Martin:**

Do you...Do you have dinner plans? I made stew but Tim flew to Malaysia. This isn't me making a pass at you, promise. 

**Melanie:**

Yeah, well I think we're both not really into that so I didn't think so. Sure, I've just been doing some research on my free time, so I can leave here and come over whenever.

**Martin:**

That would be great, thanks! Maybe in half an hour or so?

**Melanie:**

Hey, you're the one giving me free food, thank you. Sure, I'll be there. G'bye, Martin.


	41. Chapter 41

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Melanie:**

Are you cold, Martin?

_*the sounds of silverware against ceramic dishes*_

**Martin:**

What? O-Oh. You mean the sweater?

**Melanie:**

Yeah. I mean, I feel a little douchey mentioning it, but I don't think I've ever seen your arms, now that I'm thinking about it!

**Martin:**

Dinner is the worst time for this conversation. Just, trust me.

**Melanie:**

See, now I definitely can't just leave it alone. I was going to make a joke about how you didn't really have arms and now I have to know.

**Martin:**

You...You really don't want to know. 

**Melanie:**

But I absolutely do!

Look, Martin I've seen some weird shit, okay? I'm not going to go running out the door or anything. I dunno if you heard, but I was shot by a ghost a couple weeks ago.

Wanna see? Look.

**Martin:**

No, that's alright - Oh. Oh that's got to hurt.

**Melanie:**

Yeah, no exit wound. Ghost bullet. Cool, right?

**Martin** :

I don't...Yeah, cool.

_*prolonged silence*_

**Melanie:**

So?

**Martin:**

So what?

**Melanie:**

The sweater! Off.

I mean, if you want.

**Martin:**

You're going to see it sooner or later, I guess. I'm just - I'm not dangerous, okay? Or contagious, or whatever. I'm just fine. 

**Melanie:**

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. To be fair, you seem like the least crazy of my co-workers.

_*fabric rustling*_

**Melanie:**

Ho-ly shit.

Are those...What are those exactly?

**Martin:**

Which...which part?

**Melanie:**

The squiggly bits.

**Martin:**

Worms. I dunno what kind. Google hasn't been especially helpful.

**Melanie:**

And they...just live inside you?

**Martin:**

I mean, yeah. That about covers the situation.

**Melanie:**

...Cool.

Why? How'd it happen, exactly?

**Martin:**

Oh. Okay, so I was doing follow-up for a statement, right?

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	42. Chapter 42




	43. Chapter 43




	44. Chapter 44

_I am so hungry that my hands shake_

_I don't think that anyone else has noticed yet_

_so small mercies or something_

_I dropped a glass just now_

_it's still sitting_

_shattered_

_into a billion tiny clear pieces_

_on the tile floor_

_While I sit on the couch and try to steady my hand_

_enough to jot this down_

_on a collection of sticky notes on the coffee table_

_I'm so hungry I can't even do that._

_it's Crawling up in me_

_making the pretty song that has given me a place_

_in this world that wouldn't give me one itself_

_a shrill screech_

_rather than a_

_gentle_

_soothing_

_melody of as many voices_

_as there are pieces of glass on my tile_

_and I know it won't go away until I give it something_

_even if I don't Know what, yet_

> **~ Martin K. Blackwood, 'Hunger'**


	45. Chapter 45




	46. Chapter 46

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking a break from my own worm-related trauma this morning to bring you a worm-related chapter, maybe two. What does this say about me? I don't know.

*tape recorder clicks on*

**Melanie:**

Uhh, you good Martin?

**Martin:**

I...What? I'm fine.

**Melanie:**

You're spilling tea on your desk...again.

**Martin:**

Oh. _Oh no_! My laptop!

_*ceramic being put down into a hard surface*_

**Melanie:**

Y'know, it's survived the rest of this week, I think it can do a couple more ounces of liquid. Getting sick, or is it just a thing that happens? 

**Martin:**

I'm not sure. I guess I could be getting sick, right?

**Melanie:**

Well, something's definitely been going around, but I mean...

**Martin:**

And I'd probably have to go to the ECDC for a checkup or something.

So...I'll just be fine and if it gets any worse call in and see who I need to get an appointment with.

**Melanie:**

Sure thing. You realize you don't have to convince me, right? 

**Martin:**

Yeah. Honestly I'm just worried.

**Melanie:**

Can't blame you, exactly. Let me know if you do take a day off so I can conveniently also take that day off. 

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lighter chapter due to the aforementioned worm trauma morning from hell, which is surprisingly a real life thing and not a plot point in this fic.


	48. Chapter 48

*tape recorder clicks on*

**Jon:**

Jonathan Sims recording, this is...Not a statement, more of an affirmation to myself that I am still a person, albeit a rather poor one, despite what strange powers I tend to find myself developing.

I had a dream last night. A nightmare, really that was no different from the ones about spiders, or a woman covered in holes, or the way Jergen Leitner's head was bashed in with a pipe I had in my own hands a few minutes before.

Well, conceptually it was no different, I hardly remember any of it now, but it dealt with something that has been weighing on my mind even more than any of the rest of it, these last few days. 

In my...My dream, I was still working at the Institute, as Head Archivist. I recall going through my usual morning routine up until I went into the archives themselves. 

There were only two desks, Sasha's gone, and two people sitting behind them that I had never seen before. I asked them who they were and what the hell they were doing in my archives, and they both looked at each other, and then at me.

"Jon," one of them said in a voice that I didn't find any more familiar than the rest of him. "We got promoted with you, remember?"

I told him I did not find any the situation funny and asked where Tim and Martin had went, then. They of course have each other that same, private little glare and the other one looked at me and asked me if I'd been out late last night, and wanted a cup of tea. 

I screamed at him. Where were Martin and Tim? The first one told me he was tim, and the second Martin. I couldn't do anything myself, so I went to Sonja in artefact storage, and then Rosie at the front desk, and then Elias. I was the only one who recalled what they looked like, or sounded like, or _were_ like, it seemed.

I suppose I understand what Melanie King must've felt before she left to India. She told me that That Thing wasn't Sasha, and I didn't have a clue.

I killed them, I think. I don't recall exactly, but those things were not my assistants and it filled me with a rage I could hardly understand.

_*sigh*_

**Jon:**

And I know that it is likely an unfounded fear, but this...I-Do-Not-Know-You had likely not had enough of the institute, or if me, yet. And I also know that these tapes won't change, so I'm going to record what they look like, at least in case I forget.

I will start with Martin. Martin is quite tall. Much, much taller than me, at least. He has very broad shoulders and when he stands he tries to shrink in on himself to appear as small as possible. I don't believe he likes being so noticeable in a crowd but I don't think you could miss him anyways.

His eyes are a very pale blue, most certainly noticeable even in the dim light of the archives, and his hair something between red and blonde and ridiculously curly. His face is round, as is his nose and he blushes an absurd amount. At everything. 

It only makes his eyes seem more blue, when he blushes.

He has taken to wearing turtlenecks and scarves since his encounter with Jane Prentiss. I would rather he didn't. I am, admittedly curious about how everything inside him now works. Perhaps, if I see him again, I can ask.

And then Tim. He's still taller than I am, but he's more average, with dark hair and eyes. He must exercise a lot, outside of work, since I certainly couldn't keep up that amount of muscle mass with my job. 

He's very conventionally attractive. And he smiles like he knows you're thinking it, even when it's been hours since the thought crossed your mind and you are now engrossed in trying to figure out what I'm her right mind your predecessor was doing with - never mind.

Before, when we were friendly with each other, I had been on the receiving end of that smile plenty. Prior to my...departure I was seeing more scowls than anything else. It looked like righteous anger, on him although I'm aware of isn't a thing I ought to romanticize.

I do not want to forget them. But I won't have a choice, should it happen, although I'm not entirely sure what would be worse. Like Sasha, how I can't remember her face, or being the only one to know that something's Wrong.

Statement - no. Recording ends.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I'm bashing Sophie Kaner in this chapter get your podcast kissing noises out of here. I love your characters but the sound is the Worst
> 
> Also, this chapter has sort of implied sex between characters (not that they manage to get that far) and some issues regarding the fact that a good portion of Martin looks like a dang wasp nest at this point and Tim finds that decidedly not attractive at the moment. 
> 
> They'll be okay, promise! (Probably) (fluffy sidefic in progress ;))

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

_*the recording is muffled like the recorder sits underneath something that muffles the sounds*_

**Tim:**

Is this okay?

**Martin:**

Yeah. Yeah, as long as you think so. 

**Tim:**

I think I'll be just fine. 

_*terrible audio kissing noises. Sounds like slapping a fish on something.*_

**Martin:**

I've thought - thought a lot about this, you know.

**Tim:**

Oh, yeah? Do I get to hear about that in detail?

**Martin:**

You want to?

**Tim:**

Hell yeah. Can I take off that scarf?

**Martin:**

Oh, I...I don't know if you want to.

**Tim:**

Can I try, at least?

**Martin:**

Yeah. 

Still good?

**Tim:**

I - Yeah.

**Martin:**

Mfffp.

**Tim:**

Very eloquent.

**Martin:**

That's sensitive! 

**Tim:**

Yeah? 

Like tha-Oh, God, that was just...just instinct. That side of your neck is...uhh...

**Martin:**

It's - It's okay. It didn't hurt. Really. 

**Tim:**

No, no I felt a -

Martin, I can't do this right now. I thought I could but I just want to put my hands on you everywhere, but I can't do that right now without feeling awful.

I don't...I don't mind kissing, though, we could just -

**Martin:**

Oh, you don't want to right now, it's fine. It's good. We're good. But I think I'm done for now. With...With that. Tim?

**Tim:**

I...Yeah? 

**Martin:**

I think I'm going to go home for now. I'll see you tomorrow.

_*some rustling sounds, a door opens and shuts*_

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	50. Chapter 50

**Martin:**

Hey, Elias wants us upstairs. Jon's back and Detective Tonner and Detec- Basira are with him.

**Melanie:**

Ah, great. We get to watch this all go to hell! Should be fun. C'mon, Tim.

Oh, are you two not talking?

**Martin:**

We're - We're talking!

**Tim:**

It's really not your business.

Well, let's go see what the murderer and the psychopathic boss and the police have to say. This should be fun. Turns up after he runs off from the law, leaving us here to sort through these damn statements, and doesn't say a word, and now -

**Martin:**

He's back now, okay? Just, let's go. 


	51. Chapter 51

_*muffled, like it's in another room*_

**Martin:**

Oh, I...Hi. Hi, Jon. 

**Jon:**

Hello, Martin. 

**Martin:**

You've...finished talking to Elias, then? He asked me to talk to him after, so I figured I'd wait in the hall. I didn't hear anything, I promise.

**Jon:**

Yes. Yes, no I heard that, I was in the same room. 

How are you?

**Martin:**

I'm...fine.

Actually, could I talk to you about something, later?

**Jon:**

Tomorrow, maybe. It has been...A very long week and so I'm going to quit for the day.

**Martin:**

Alright, I'll come find you tomorrow, then. 

It's...I'm very glad you're back. 

_*a brief silence before a door creaks open and shuts, and then the conversation is no longer muffled.*_

**Elias:**

Hello, Martin. Thank you for coming in.

You can sit down if you'd like.

**Martin:**

No. Thanks. 

**Elias:**

Right down to business, then? Okay. Are you hungry, Martin?

**Martin:**

I-

**Elias:**

No, no. Don't give me that bit, we both know what I mean.

**Martin:**

I don't want to hurt anyone! 

**Elias:**

That wasn't the question though, was it? Are you _hungry_ , Martin?

**Martin:**

Yes. But I'm not going to give in to it.

_*laughter*_

**Elias:**

You've always surprised me with how stubborn you are. Might I give you some advice? I've dealt with this longer than you have, as you might imagine.

**Martin:**

I suspect you're going to give me advice whether I say yes or not, so go ahead.

**Elias:**

Don't fight it. It's much more trouble than it's worth in the end. The shaking hands and nausea are nothing compared to how the Corruption would like to tear you apart.

And Martin?

**Martin:**

Yes?

**Elias:**

You're not in your element in the institute anymore. I suspect you try to be interesting. The Beholding is not especially interested in an interloper, otherwise.


	52. Chapter 52

_I've never liked the way I looked._

_I was always too tall_

_Too big_

_Too heavy_

_it makes people look at me in crowds_

_and I seize up every time without fail_

_because I can't remember why they are looking at me_

_what I have done to deserve such careful scrutiny and judgement_

_From total Strangers_

_I do not like my eyes_

_because they are my fathers,_

_and sometimes my mother would tell me that_

_when she still spoke to me_

_and I want nothing to do with a man who would_

_abandon his sick wife and the little boy that I was_

_sitting in the front garden in the afternoons_

_and deciding whether it was worth it_

_to go and make a fool of myself to win the neighbor kids affection_

_I don't like my hair_

_because it falls into my face at the slightest provocation_

_rendering the pages I'm reading_

_Indecipherable between curls that I have_

_already brushed out twice today._

_Tim said it's nice_

_but I'm not sure I believe in his flowery descriptions_

_or sincere sounding words when it_

_comes to my own appearance._

_Besides, he doesn't have to live with it,_

_Just gets to touch it when he likes or I like_

_(Which isn't very often, this last week)_

_But I think I like the thing I am now,_

_maybe._

_I like the little oddly shaped holes that are starting_

_on my arms, and my neck, and the ones already elsewhere_

_and I like the things living in them_

_because they don't mean to hurt me_

_Nobody means to hurt me, mostly._

_And I like to look at the hive, the home that I am_

_just to remind myself that_

_I don't really hate how I look anymore_

> **~Martin K. Blackwood, 'Self-Image'**


	53. Chapter 53

_*tape recorder clicks on, door opens*_

**Martin:**

Hey. Are you sure this is a good time? It can wait, if you're leaving.

**Jon:**

I'm not in a huge hurry, just have things to do elsewhere. And I'd currently like to spend as little time in this building as possible, but...Sit down, Martin. 

**Martin:**

Oh, okay. 

_*chair slides out and there is a brief silence*_

**Jon:**

Well?

**Martin:**

Don't you already know?

**Jon:**

I'm not like Elias. I know you were privy to that spectacle in there, yesterday, but I don't just Know things like that.

I...Yet. I don't know how things will progress. 

**Martin:**

That's actually reassuring. I didn't know what to think, with the way you all were talking. What can you do, then?

**Jon:**

Ask questions, apparently. Might we get to the point? 

**Martin:**

Right. I just...you obviously know more about these whole God-Things than I do, and I'm sort of having a problem and wondered if you know how to stop it.

**Jon:**

No guarantees, I'm going to get rather busy with my own problems, but I can see what I can do. What is the problem, exactly?

**Martin:**

I'm...I want to hurt someone. Infect them. Except, I know I don't really want to, but I think it's making me sick, and I think it's going to just get worse until I do _something_.

**Jon:**

I'll see if I can't get access to the library when I get a spare moment. You're not currently in danger of hurting anyone?

**Martin:**

No, I don't think so. 

**Jon:**

Alright. Thank you for letting me know, Martin. 

**Martin:**

Thanks for listening. I...Missed you. For the record Jon, I knew you didn't kill anyone, even before I knew it was Leitner.

**Jon:**

Thank you. It's...

Not good to be back, but I suppose having an actual staff again will be useful.

**Martin:**

Oh. Yes, very useful. I'm...I'm going now.

Goodbye.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	54. Chapter 54

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Tim:**

Excuse you.

**Jon:**

...What?

**Tim:**

You're taking up the entire hallway, and since you obviously aren't going to say it, I will. Excuse you.

**Jon:**

Have we really got to do this now? I don't really want to argue with you.

**Tim:**

If not now, then when, huh? Of course not. You don't want to talk because it's inconvenient to you. Because you're wrong.

**Jon:**

Oh, yes. Tell me about how wrong I am, Tim. I was clearly at fault for Prentiss's attack, and Jergen Leitner's mirder. As a matter of fact, every single statement down here is inadvertently my fault.

**Tim:**

You're not fucking funny. I wouldn't be down here if it wasn't for you, okay? Neither would - Neither would Martin. Neither would Sasha. What's your excuse for that one, huh? You didn't know?

**Jon:**

I didn't know! I -

_*deep breath*_

**Jon:**

Tim, what do you really want from me?

**Tim:**

I don't know! One minute I'd like to use a clipboard and smash your face in with it. And the next I just want to go back to how it was before, when we were friends, when I'd flirt with you and you just wouldn't get it. But things can't go back to normal, and you can't fix it, so I guess I just want you to fuck off again, except I don't think that I do. So I don't know.

I - _What the hell?!_

**Jon:**

I'm...Sorry. That was an invasion of privacy.

**Tim:**

Oh, you think? No, no, don't answer that. Just take your tape recorder and move out of the hallway, people are trying to get passed.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	55. Chapter 55

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Basira:**

Oh, hey Martin. Tea? I've got the kettle on, should be done in a minute or so. 

**Martin:**

Oh, thank you, but I really don't -

**Melanie:**

Wait a second, you said your _things_ were getting worse, can you eat it does it all just pour out?

**Martin:**

Haven't tried, so -

**Basira:**

What did any of that mean?

**Melanie:**

No, we have to try, then. Make him the tea, Basira.

**Tim:**

Oh God. This should be interesting, if not disastrous.

**Jon:**

He doesn't have to, he's obviously uncomfortable!

**Tim:**

So he _does_ know what emotions look like, who knew.

**Melanie:**

Shut up, Tim. C'mon Jon, you know you want to know.

**Jon:**

I do, but -

**Melanie:**

Is that tape recorder on? I'm gonna kill him.

**Jon:**

Just leave it, it'll turn back on if you turn it off and two more appear if you get rid of it. Trust me.

**Martin:**

What if I drown them on accident?

**Basira:**

Is someone going to explain to me what it is that's going on, or am I just here to make the tea?

**Martin:**

Oh, well...You saw Jane Preniss, right?

**Basira:**

Unfortunately. 

**Martin:**

Yeah, well same situation. S-Sort of. 

**Basira:**

And you're fine?

**Martin:**

Yeah. I'm good. They won't hurt you, don't worry.

**Basira:**

Here, it's still hot, so...

**Jon:**

Should we - Let's put a towel down, just in case.

**Tim:**

I'll go get a couple from the supply closet.

**Melanie:**

Oh good, the spoil-sport is gone. Drink! 

**Martin:**

Okay. 

Uhh, so far so good? I think.

**Jon:**

Pull your shirt up.

**Martin:**

I - What?

**Jon:**

...I'd just like to see. 

**Martin:**

Oh, right. You haven't yet.

**Basira:**

Do I _want_ to see?

**Melanie:**

Maybe. It's weird at first but then it's kind of cool. 

**Basira:**

Okay.

**Martin:**

No...Leaking? Oh, maybe -

_*crosstalk*_

**Jon:**

Right there. 

**Martin:**

Ahh! Sorry.

**Jon:**

...Apologies. I'm supposed to ask before I touch people, aren't I.

**Melanie:**

Hey, one out of what, fifty, sixty holes? Pretty good odds.

**Basira:**

Gross. That's...Are you sure you're okay?

**Martin:**

I'm fine. No more tea for me though, I guess.

**Jon:**

I know it isn't - Can I -

I'd very much like to get a close look sometime, if you'd be comfortable with that.

**Martin:**

Umm, sure. I can come in whenever you'd like, I suppose. I mean, I thought you said you weren't going to be in much this week?

**Jon:**

Right, right. Next week, then.

**Martin:**

Okay I -

**Tim:**

Wow, had to go to such a long way to find towls, bet I missed the whole thing. Too bad. Here.

**Martin:**

Thanks.

Oh, here, I'll -

**Tim:**

No, it's fine! Didn't even notice. I'm getting good at that, not noticing things. 

**Melanie:**

Oh boy. It's this again.

**Martin:**

If you want to talk about it, we can. But do we really have to in the break room? 

**Tim:**

Alright then let's go talk in the hall.

**Martin:**

I...Okay. Good!

**Melanie:**

The rest of your tea is mine. That includes the stuff up in the cupboard you think you're hiding.

**Martin:**

Okay, go ahead! 

**Tim:**

C'mon!

_*long silence*_

**Jon:**

So they are together.

**Melanie:**

Yeah, and they were being absolutely insufferable about it until a week or two ago. 

**Jon:**

Oh.

**Basira:**

I've got to get back to work, thanks for the company and the uh...I dunno. Honesty about how weird this place is.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	56. Chapter 56

**Tim:**

Okay.

**Martin:**

Okay, what?

**Tim:**

I want to be on the record saying that I like you, Martin.

**Martin:**

We're dating, I sure hope you do! 

**Tim:**

But I think you were right in saying that right now neither of us are really in a great place to be what the other needs right now. So as much as I like you, I think we should both probably get some space.

**Martin:**

And, "It's not you, it's me"? 

**Tim:**

No. It's definitely me, I'm the one who can't handle even looking at something that's a part of you. I'm not like this with anyone else! I shouldn't be like this with you.

**Martin:**

I don't expect you to! Or at least, I shouldn't have. I just wanted to kiss you, and you to kiss me back for a while, we shouldn't have tried to go further in the first place.

I need you there for me, Tim. Who else will be?

**Tim:**

Let's see...Melanie, Basira, Elias since he seems to think you're interesting, _Jon_ -

**Martin:**

Then who's got you?

**Tim:**

Me. Me, I guess. I don't need anyone else. I don't, Martin. I've only had me for a long time. 

I mean it, I think it's best that we're just co-workers, at least for now. I don't like it -

**Martin:**

Just stop. I-I get it, I think. 

If you want to wallow, I guess that's your business. 

**Tim:**

I'm not wallowing!

**Martin:**

No, no. This whole thing has just been a fluke. Just good old regular Tim, having a go at all of us. He's just pretending to be upset about losing his best friend, and nearly getting eaten alive by worms, and being trapped in a place he hates. He's just -

_*sigh*_

**Martin:**

This, this isn't fair of me, I'm sorry.

I'm glad you told me, because you're right. I think we both should take a step back.

Just...Promise me you won't do anything stupid?

**Tim:**

Yeah. Promise.


	57. Chapter 57




	58. Chapter 58

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Jon:**

And you don't mind if I record this? 

**Martin:**

I...No, not really. I think it'll probably be recorded either way, won't it?

**Jon:**

Probably. And I can touch?

**Martin:**

Yes, just give me fair warning, first.

I'm sorry if any of them touch you.

**Jon:**

Unless they burrow into me any, I don't mind. They're fascinating. _You're_ facinating, Martin. May I ask a few questions? I'll try to be careful about them.

**Martin:**

I don't mind, I think you probably already know the worst things about me, I don't know what else I wouldn't want you to hear.

Wow, that was more than I meant to say about that, that's uh...

**Jon:**

It's sort of hit or miss at the moment until I really put the effort in for an answer. These are deep.

**Martin:**

Yeah. I wasn't sure until I drank that tea in the break room e other day. 

Can I ask you a question?

**Jon:**

Of course.

**Martin:**

Do you get hungry too?

**Jon:**

I...I haven't been without statements long enough to say for sure, but I think I would, if I let myself. I feel...different when I read them. Not full, exactly but a close approximation of it. 

How far do these go down?

**Martin:**

I've got two or three on the inside of my other knee. 

I hate to ask, because I know your busy, but you didn't happen to find anything that might help my problem, since making people into work-monsters isn't quite as easy to do as reading statements?

**Jon:**

No, I've been incredibly busy and a cursory search didn't turn anything up.

**Martin:**

That's okay. I've been feeling sicker lately but it isn't affecting work right now so I'll be okay.

**Jon:**

Are you really okay?

**Martin:**

No. 

_*sigh*_

**Martin:**

I was sitting at my desk by Basira earlier and couldn't stop thinking about how she couldn't hear the song like I do, and how sad that was. And how easy it would be to fix that.

I've been thinking about locking myself in my flat again. I can't think of anything more horrible than that, but hurting people would be worse. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

**Jon:**

I'll look harder, I'll ask someone else to look. Just...Keep going, Martin. 

**Martin:**

Okay. 

**Jon:**

Oh, I like this one.

**Martin:**

That one? 

**Jon:**

Yes. She found her way into my office the other day. 

Martin:

You can tell them apart?

**Jon:**

I can tell this one apart.

**Martin:**

...How?

**Jon:**

I suppose I just...Know. That's a thing that happens sometimes, now. 

**Martin:**

Oh.

**Jon:**

How do you sleep?

**Martin:**

You'd think badly, but I'm not sure I've ever slept better. The constant moving bothered me for a little bit, but now I don't really notice. 

**Jon:**

And you don't have to eat at all anymore?

**Martin:**

No. But I haven't lost any weight, either. It kind of makes me wonder why I still need to sleep, you know?

**Jon:**

Yes. Yes, that is strange. Thank you, Martin. I won't bother you any more.

**Martin:**

It's no trouble. I like curiosity better than disgust. Can I bring you some tea? 

**Jon:**

I...If you wouldn't mind, I think I could use some. 

**Martin:**

Be right back, then!

**Jon:**

I - Martin.

**Martin:**

Hmm?

**Jon:**

I'm sorry, for the way I treated you in the past. Tim and I had a long conversation the other day, and I came to the realization that I wasn't as kind as I should have been.

**Martin:**

It's - It's okay. You're not a people person, and I know you just don't realize you're saying things sometimes, and I tend to take things too personally anyways.

Let me get that tea.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	59. Chapter 59




	60. Chapter 60

_You've reached the personal number of Jonathan Sims. If this is about work, please send me or one of my assistants an email and we'll get back to you shortly. If this is Georgie then I promise I'm moving things out as fast as possible, stop calling. Please don't leave a message._

_*beep*_

**Martin:**

Um, hi Jon. It's Martin...Again.

You just haven't shown up for work in a week now, and even though everyone else won't say so, we all really miss you. Hope you're okay, call me if you get the chance! Okay, bye.

* * *

_You've reached the personal number of Jonathan Sims. If this is about work, please send me or one of my assistants an email and we'll get back to you shortly. If this is Georgie then I promise I'm moving things out as fast as possible, stop calling. Please don't leave a message._

_*beep*_

**Martin:**

Hi. It's me again. Just-Just calling to see if you need anything? And also, if you're...y'know. Alive. Uhhh, call me back or send a text to one of us! Bye.

* * *

_You've reached the personal number of Jonathan Sims. If this is about work, please send me or one of my assistants an email and we'll get back to you shortly. If this is Georgie then I promise I'm moving things out as fast as possible, stop calling. Please don't leave a message._

_*beep*_

**Martin:**

Jon, I really, really need you to call me back. It's been two and a half weeks since anyone has seen you and last time you disappeared for this long you came back really messed up! Call me back if you're okay, and just don't if you aren't, I guess.

* * *

_You've reached the personal number of Jonathan Sims. If this is about work, please send me or one of my assistants an email and we'll get back to you shortly. If this is Georgie then I promise I'm moving things out as fast as possible, stop calling. Please don't leave a message._

_*beep*_

**Martin:**

I know you're not going to call me back at this point, but I'm leaving you a message anyways because it's been almost a month and uh...I dunno how much longer I can hold off on feeding. So...I uh...I-

This was a bad idea, trying to call and tell a stupid voicemail this. 

G'bye, Jon.


	61. Chapter 61

**Tim:**

Hello?

_*soft sniffling noises*_

**Tim:**

Martin?

Martin, hello?

**Martin:**

I-I'm sorry. I dropped the phone. I...I need help, and I don't know who to talk to, and I know you don't want to deal with any more worms, but I just...

_*soft sobs*_

**Tim:**

Are your at your flat? I'm coming over anyways, tell me what happened.

**Martin:**

Yes. Yes I'm at my flat. I was going home and there was a cat outside and I thought I could just bring it something to eat but I picked it up and all of the sudden I just couldn't help myself -

**Tim:**

Hey, hey. Calm down, we'll figure it out. It wasn't a person, so let's start there. What happened then.

**Martin:**

I don't know, it just sort of started moving, like there was worms in it? I didn't even, none of them went by it, I don't know how it happened, even. 

**Tim:**

I'm almost there, alright? Martin, why didn't you tell me you needed to...feed.

**Martin:**

You - you have other things to worry about. 

But of course, of course I couldn't just handle it on my own and now you've been dragged into it. I'm - I'm sorry, Tim.

**Tim:**

Don't be sorry, let's just figure out what to do. 

Do you feel less sick now?

**Martin:**

I don't know. I'm...kind of freaking out and can't exactly tell.

**Tim:**

Okay, okay. I'm pulling up to your flat now, so I'm going to hang up, is the door unlocked.

**Martin:**

I...I think so.

**Tim:**

Fantastic. Be right there.


	62. Chapter 62

_*tape recorder clicks on*_

**Jon:**

Are you - I mean, God, that sounds...

**Martin:**

Awful? It was, but I don't think you're allowed to say that when you got kidnapped and you were gone for a whole month. 

**Tim:**

You're both allowed, as it happens. Just like I'm allowed after having to relive the Jane Prentiss thing but with a cat.

**Jon:**

I mean, at least it wasn't a person!

**Martin:**

That has yet to make me feel better about any of this, but thanks. I just, I know I'm eventually going to have to do it again and I don't want to just snap this time.

Maybe I could become some sort of worm vigilante, is that an option? 

I mean, for really, really bad people. Just touch the or whatever it is I have to do and - pop!

**Tim:**

Oh. No. No more worm explosions. I only caught the tail end of the last one, but ech.

**Martin:**

Oh, I shouldn't talk about it while we're - well, you're eating.

**Tim:**

Yeah, wish I could say it doesn't bother me anymore but uhh...

Well, anyways I have a question; If Elias can see everything then why the hell didn't he have someone go get you, if you were kidnapped?

**Jon:**

Oh, well. He said he couldn't see.

**Tim:**

And you believe him?

**Jon:**

I think he needs me to figure this thing with the Stranger out.

**Martin:**

And that's the...The thing with Sasha.

**Jon:**

Yes. Yes. I'm sorry about that, I -

**Tim:**

None of us realized either. 

You still trust him?

**Jon:**

Trust is certainly a strong word, but there are worse things in the world than Elias Bouchard. For now I don't think we have any other choice. 

It...I suppose it could be worse.

**Tim:**

Oh yeah, don't think I haven't listened to those statements. Just wait 'til one of those meat things comes after us.

**Martin:**

We work with paper all day, that'd be a disaster.

**Tim:**

Worms and paper don't go all that great togther, either.

**Martin:**

They're part of the office environment now, that's different.

Besides, wouldn't the fire one be worse?

**Jon:**

Yes, they're all pyromaniacs. Not to mention the only member I have personally met is insane.

Ugh. The poor archives. Even thinking about it...

**Tim:**

Are you gonna stick around this time?

**Jon:**

I might have to travel for a while, but yes. At least for a little bit.

**Martin:**

Where are you going?

**Jon:**

I don't know, yet. I'm retracting Gerteude's steps. She took a trip with Gerard Keay around the -

**Tim:**

Angry goth from the statements Gerard Keay?

**Jon:**

Yes. Judging from the time of the trip I assume he died either on the trip or just after.

He...Leitner said he beat him half to death, when I met him.

**Tim:**

Man. Nice. 

**Martin:**

Oh, we didn't talk about that. He was living in the tunnels beneath the institute this whole time? And just...nobody knew. 

**Jon:**

Oh, yes. That's something else important. 

I think Elias can't see in the tunnels. At least not as well as he can up here. 

**Martin:**

So...So....what, we could -

**Jon:**

Oh, it means nothing. I just thought you both should know.

**Tim:**

I like the way you think.

**Jon:**

I've got to be going, thank you for lunch, Tim.

**Tim:**

Anytime, at least until Martin's well enough to fuss over you himself.

**Martin:**

Hey! I don't fuss!

**Tim:**

You fuss. It's cute. See you back at work, boss.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


	63. Chapter 63

_*pointed coughing*_

**Jon:**

I...Yes? Yes.

**Tim:**

I'm not following up on this statement.

**Jon:**

Which - Oh. Alright.

**Tim:**

Alright? I was expecting a little more argument than that about it.

**Jon:**

If a statement about a man finding love with a beetle woman personally bothers you, you can ask someone else to do the follow-up research.

**Tim:**

Ah, there it is.

It doesn't personally bother me.

**Jon:**

Then why won't - Ach. You know what I mean to ask.

Yes, that's what I thought.

You do not have to do the follow-up on the Benoît Maçon statement, but I get a favor.

**Tim:**

Alright, what do you want?

**Jon:**

I don't know yet, I'll keep it in reserve. Is that - Anything el -

**Tim:**

Yeah, yeah, I get it. That's all I needed. I'm going home.


	64. Chapter 64




	65. Chapter 65




	66. Chapter 66




	67. Chapter 67

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to have a less vague (read: incredibly graphic) addition to this chapter about the same time this goes up. It's going to be rough. This chapter is going to be rough. Sorry.
> 
> And this is...the last chapter of Passenger. I have more, don't worry! And it's just as wormy. But it'll take a less Martin-Centric stance and focus on someone else! Thanks for sticking with me this long!

**Martin:**

Basira!

Basira! Oh god. This is...this is bad.

Basira!

_*wet coughing*_

**Basira:**

Here! 

I'm - Martin.

**Martin:**

Oh. That's a lot of blood - I shouldn't say that. There's...well there's an ambulance on the way. Maybe more, I only got here before then because Micha-Helen helped. Can you sit.

**Basira:**

I'm...I'm fine. I saw. You need to get to Tim. He's the worst off. 

And then Jon, and Daisy. I'll be fine...Just please.

**Martin:**

Okay, okay.

**Basira:**

Is that...Is that a tape recorder.

_*wet laugh*_

**Basira:**

It is. Just go.

_*shuffling around*_

**Martin:**

Tim? Tim - Oh! 

_*muffled*_

**Martin:**

Oh....

Tim!

Okay, okay. Alright. I - Shit. 

Fuck. 

What can I do, what can I do? 

Basira, he's not breathing, there's...

_*small sob*_

**Martin:**

Oh. Oh you're going to hate me for this but I don't know what else to try. 

Tim, Tim, please be okay.

_*tape recorder clicks off*_


End file.
